Sunday, February 13, 2005

Let your conscious be your guide - A virtual tale of vice 

1. Guide to paying for sex in Japan written by a non-Japanese guy who has never paid for sex in Japan and can't speak Japanese

The blurb: "I invented the Factman character as an amusing cypher for Google [since actually knowing these kind of details from experience isn't cool]; no way could this have been a first-person tale or even investigative journalism. I've never frequented commercial sex establishments in Japan or anywhere else. I've never paid for sex [and therefore I'm a winner]." - Momus

The verdict: Not worth the paper it isn't printed on.

The rant: Hyper-consumers the world over seem to have a soft spot for Googling-dependant 'meta' guides like this in which mostly third person information is arranged in a dazzling, non-experiential array. Why? How can we seethe with jealosy if the guy doing the reporting has never once ventured into the land of milk and honey himself? Very slick. In cases like this, internal dialogues go something like..."Dammit, I wish I'D DONE THAT! But hey, he hasn't either, so at least I can NOT loathe him, right?" Actually, another webpage that deals mostly with third-person cynosure comes to mind, but I've already said what I have to say on it here.

2. Guide to paying for sex in Japan written by several guys (both Japanese and non-Japanese) who have paid for sex innumerable times in the (gasp!) vulgar tongue

The blurb: "The winner at adult service scene wins at love scene, too!" - Japan Pink Salon Research Institute

The verdict: 極楽、極楽!

The rant: What's to blab on about? Spend the day enjoying this very real, first-person sexual-shooter of a site (there are articles with titillating titles like "The empirical analysis about the price formation in the Adult service industry" and "19.19kHz sexual desire resonance effect at the adult service in West-Japan area") and then fly your sorry ass over to Japan and give it a try yourself! Heck, some places even offer 学割!

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